I am advancing further into my 6th decade of life (remember years 0 to 9 count, too). Grateful to be alive and doing fairly well, I find myself thinking about my mark on the world. I am very active within my community. I serve within the Democratic Party currently at a state level and previously at a county level. I am still active within my precinct even though I could be more active. I am active within my church participating in the Women of the ELCA and doing outreach. Also, I am an active member of my beloved sorority Delta Sigma Theta Sorority, Inc. I also show love and care for my family & friends, though small we are all close. Still I find myself thinking am I doing enough?
I hope to die a happy & healthy old lady still active within the world. My goal at one point was to live to be 110 years old. There is a reason behind it but I would prefer not to share it in this very public space. Last week I turned another year older and it has me thinking now what? What will my mark be on the world and will it make a difference? I have a lot of ideas rolling through my brain, writing a non-fiction book, creating visual art in the form of collages, and continuing the activism that I do now. But again is this enough?
It always surprises me when I am thanked for my activism or even when someone notices. I am somewhat of a shy person…yes, I am honestly shy. Not painfully shy like when I was a child but I don’t like a lot of straight on attention. I am somewhat a recluse or rather an introvert. I enjoy being with people but I also enjoy time by myself. I feed off the energy of others then go off by myself to do my own thing until I need another boost of people energy.
Recently during a SC WELCA convention, I was inspired to doodle. When I looked down at my paper there before my eyes was the first draft of a collage collection. I have wanted to do collages for some time now but just couldn’t sketch out an idea. Now I have a clear idea and the material, along with an end-vision. Still I did not have a space to create my art. I am not the best domestic goddess but even in my home I felt I needed a dedicated separate studio. My prayers have been answered by my local library. I now have a space to create and get messy but I have to transport materials. For me this is a good thing it will help me stay more focused on my various projects.
The space that I now have access too was previously dedicated to something else. Mostly textile related but as the universe has a tendency to do lately it morphed into what I needed. I am not saying I am special, nor that the universe bends toward my arc only but lately I ask and I get. I have learned to be very clear about my asks. And to make sure I ask for the right things and not just non-chalantly ask for something I don’t need nor really want.
There is enough abundance for us all…this is something I truly believe. Sadly there are those who have abundant wealth and goods or services who do not share. I too can be guilty of this, especially when approached by a pan-handler. It is not always easy knowing what we should really be doing to make a positive mark in the world. For christians like myself the mark on the world should never be about ourselves but about that light of God. When I remember this I am better for it and doors open freely. Even when I forget I feel the light of hope shine on me and open doors, which reminds me I am a child of grace.
Finally, this post is not about faith or grace but more about being purposeful each day. Who I am and how I find my purpose and my plan in this world may be different from yours. What I will say is try walking in God’s light it is pretty awesome. It will lead you down the path you need to go. The road may seem a little winding but eventually you land right where you should be. Following the road and the light of grace in the end will help you find where, when, and how to make your mark in this world. May God’s peace be with you along your journey.