Left For Dead


~~~

This is not exactly a feel-good story.

A little over five years ago in 2005, on my 39th birthday, my boyfriend John, was brutally murdered by my ex-boyfriend in my own home. The reason why I’m able to tell you any of this?  My ex-boyfriend thought he had murdered me too. He definitely ended my wonderful life as I knew it.  And yes, my ex-boyfriend did get life in prison, plus an additional 23 years.  I would have been equally satisfied with the death penalty, but that’s a debate for a different day.

The next three years were a blur.  I threw myself into the real estate career I loved,  moved from the crime scene and bought a condo in 2006.  I attended ‘The Police’ reunion concert in 2007.  Celebrated my son’s high school graduation in 2008.  The physical scars faded.  My friends and loved ones heard me laugh, again. Everyone got use to seeing me weigh 25 lbs lighter than I did before John was murdered.  I met a new man.

Then the fall of 2008 happened. And my fragile ‘new normal’ life ended too.

Within a six week period, my favorite Aunt Pat – and the heart of our family – died.  I was laid off from my New Homes Sales Manager position the day of Pat’s memorial service.  In case you didn’t notice, the housing market imploded during this time, taking my dream job and thousands (millions?) of other jobs with it.  And the relationship I so hoped would be proof that there really is love after John; well, it painfully ended.

I really don’t remember much from the last two years.  Except I did a lot of yoga, primarily to keep myself from committing suicide.  It worked.

By mid 2010, yoga was no longer enough to keep me sane and upright.  Although I had FINALLY landed a job after 9 months of unemployment, it gave me soul numbing stress.  Plus, the salary was over 50% less than I had previously earned.  Consequently, I could not pay my original monthly mortgage payments and the bank was unwilling to modify the loan (mental note to self, never buy a home at the top of the market).

I began questioning why I was holding on to a property that was keeping me house poor, ruining my credit and steadily depreciating. So I did what I vowed I would never do.  I told my pride to just SHUT UP ALREADY! And not worry about what others may think. I put my home on the market and moved back in with my sainted mother. I also   gave myself permission to reboot, rebuild, recharge, and re-do my life

It’s been 6 months now. Sounds crazy, but I actually turned down two jobs because I am determined to NEVER AGAIN accept employment solely to pay the bills. I’m up for a job as a New Homes Sales Manager Assistant. Keep your fingers crossed.  I’ve also decided to go back to school to follow the dream I abandoned over 30 years ago – becoming a lawyer. It could happen.  And guess what?  When and where and with whom I least expected, I fell in love. And I rededicated myself to my yoga practice which gives me spiritual balance and combats the 25 lbs I eventually regained.

Now 2011 is here and so am I.  Maybe this is a feel-good story after all.  It’s certainly a new chapter for me.

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6 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Michelle
    Jan 03, 2011 @ 20:01:21

    This was a good story of life after struggle. I am glad you shared this story and kept it real. Most people make you believe that starting your life over is a quick fix to success. I know you will make good with your decisions. Thank you for sharing.

    Reply

    • Mallori
      Jan 10, 2011 @ 16:42:04

      Thank you all for your heartwarming words. What I know for sure is we all have a story, that once told, uplifts, inspires or informs us all.

      Reply

  2. Calandra King
    Jan 01, 2011 @ 17:36:08

    This is an very inspiring story of survival, and it gives a lot of people that are feeling down about their situation hope. And it also displays a powerful message of your cares seems so small when you see and read that someone’s is much more powerful and how they over came giants! May God continue to Bless you in everything that you do!

    Reply

  3. Gloria Bean
    Jan 01, 2011 @ 17:14:26

    Love it! A bit heartwrenching but oh so thankful Mallori is stil here with us! Glad to have you both as fellow alum! Keep up the good work.

    Reply

  4. renegade357
    Jan 01, 2011 @ 15:52:12

    I Love This Post! What A Great Story!!! #GiveThanks

    Reply

    • Joyce Rose-Harris
      Jan 01, 2011 @ 16:10:12

      Thank you for comment. To be sure not to miss the next posts scheduled for Jan 16th, you can subscribe to the blog for free! Look for the “Subscribe” button on the right near the bottom. And again, thank you and Happy New Year!

      Reply

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